3 more dirty outdoor thing pictures from my friend's camera.

The one of Maddie shooting a paintball gun is priceless....

Some more recent happenings

Maddie's first eye doctor appointment. Geesh, that girl is brave. She let them put all kinds of drops and gadgets into her eyes. She looks so tiny here. And, don't worry, she has great eyes.

And then she had to wear these the next 24 hours and stay out of the sun. She was of course a little nazi who went around and closed all of the blinds in the house and proudly wore these glasses.

She REALLY likes daddy daughter date night bowling and the shoes they give her too.

We also had a great time this last weekend at a friend's cabin in Utah doing dirty outdoor things.

And Josh taught Maddie how to make a wish......

Fishing at Panguitch Lake (Maddie wanted to know why there were no penguins)

We drove from the coast of California to the mountains of Utah in one, very long day. Somehow, Maddie was a total sweetheart the entire time we were in the car. But at the end, she wanted to try some of Josh's Mountain Dew. It was the first time she had tasted caffeine, and she turned into a little spaz. Here she is coloring and talking at 100 miles per hour after about 8 hours in the car:

Riding in the back of the truck for the first time:

Being a fisher girl:

For some reason this girl is fascinated by wormies.

Oh Captain My Captain:

You find out what kind of parents you are when you find a leech, yes, I said leech, sucking between your little girls toes and you realize you have no idea how to get it off without googling it and you are stuck on a mountain with no internet access. Thank goodness tough Grandma Carol was there to play nurse. This picture doesn't do justice to how gross these things are. They actually throb as they suck and who knows how long that thing was sucking!

4th of July in Newport Beach

Josh and I excitedly took Maddie to the fireworks booth and picked out the largest, most obnoxious ones they had. (Here they are with the awesome stash pre-fireworks show.) Maddie was so excited she just kept hugging us and saying, "Happy Fourth of July!" We anxiously waited until it was dark enough, and we started out our fireworks show with a BANG! And sadly, Maddie cried and screamed and begged us to stop. She was SO terrified of the fire. No matter what we tried to do to calm her down, she just kept saying she wanted to go to bed. WHAT A BUMMER!! On the plus side, she told us that we could do fireworks again when she was ten years old. :o/

A fourth of july activity that she enjoyed: practicing rollerblading with her daddy at about 0.2 mph.

And making their traditional rice krispies treats together.

And making sand castles together. I swear I am a part of these activities too, but I am just always the one behind the camera.

And we were so excited to see cousin Elena and her family at the beach house too. It was a GREAT place to spend the holiday.

Maddie Adds Color to Our Lives

Well, I have to admit I'm a pretty private person, and my grief about my boys is saved for private conversations with my husband, middle of the night tearful phone calls to my mother, and for moments alone in the shower or the car.

I will say that at a time when it is easy to only see gray everywhere you look, Maddie provides a LOT of color to mine and Josh's life. (And I'm not just talking about her fashion.)

She drags me out of bed for breakfast, and lines up all of her friends to watch and talk to me over cereal. How are you not going to smile at that?

Dressed for just a regular day:

She does yoga with me occasionally, and I hate that she is naturally so much better than me:

Showing us what she learned at her gymnastics show. (Notice the belt? It is her way of being rebellious against her school uniforms.)

Looking almost fifteen and scaring me:

Getting so excited about her press on nails, which, sadly, lasted the traditional 30 seconds before falling off:

She got to pick one toy at the store in the airport. What did she choose? A calculator. What a weirdo:

Being cute without even trying:

Roasting hotdogs and marshmallows, and eating tuna fish sandwiches at Grandma Karen's cabin:

News About Our Baby

As you may know we found out yesterday that our baby has SMA (the same condition Evan had). We were shocked and heartbroken by the news, but this morning we feel more at peace. We feel we want to give our son a life of dignity and love for whatever time we will have with him. It is important for him to know his mother, father, big sister, and all of his family and friends love him. We still plan to paint his nursery blue and take him to a Rebel game. :o) We want you to know that it is okay to talk about him with us, to be excited about him, and to feel some sadness too.

With Love,
Joshua & Rachel Harris

Madster's Enchanted Life

Her new goggles for swim class. (upside down works too)

Somehow, even after almost five years, she is continuing to surprise me almost daily with her creativity in fashion. She insists that skirts can be worn as shirts too.

When I told her and her friend they could have a snack, I didn't realize they would help themselves to popsicles dipped in sprinkles. Once again, her creativity surprised and impressed me.

Maddie's end of the year school carnival was very cool. Of course, since the Hannah Montana movie she is very seriously considering being a cowgirl when she grows up. At least that is what she tells me. Here she is getting some good practice in.

I am happy to be 28!

Birthdays are not a big deal to me, but they are to the Harris family. And Maddie is definitely a Harris. She wanted to throw me a "huge party" for my birthday and took her job as party planner very serious. My sister was nice enough to take her to the party supply store and let her pick out whatever she wanted and to help her make a cake.

Every woman dreams about having puppy decorations at their 28th birthday party.

And the streamers were breathtaking.

And I have never loved another birthday cake as much as I loved this beautiful and creative one.

Although this surprise dessert from Josh, brought out by the waiters of SW Steakhouse at the Wynn, was pretty darn close. (I HIGHLY recommend this place for very special events!)

All in all, I had a happy birthday party with my family and a romantic birthday dinner with my husband. It is a promising start to a wonderful new year ahead of me.

I lied...

I'm not patient. My sister-in-law, Juli, told me about this test you can buy at Walgreens that you pee into and it tells you the gender of your baby. So, of course, Josh and I went down and bought the test. What did it say you might ask?

So what did we do? We went directly to another one of those commercial ultrasound places. We told the lady she had to be darn sure about the gender, and after 45 minutes of looking at the baby in every direction and angle and nook and cranny (or lack thereof), she said it is definitely a boy. So to me, that means 99% sure, which is enough to at least start considering nursery colors and names.

A lesson in PATience

Have you ever seen the SNL skit of "Pat," where the central aspect of the sketches was the inability of others to determine the character's gender? I wonder if the creator of that skit was also an extremely impatient pregnant mother who pressured people to tell her the gender of her unborn child WAY before you could even tell. My doctor was smart in not saying his guess of the gender at 10 weeks. Apparently, two women whom you pay $75 each for a commercial ultrasound and gender check have not googled how many weeks it takes to tell the gender of a fetus. Because one said for sure a boy, and the other said for sure a girl. Google (and my doctor) says it is impossible to tell before 12 weeks, and you should wait until 15 weeks to tell the gender because both genders look exactly the same until then. 

So am I having a girl or a boy? I am not going to ask anymore, or declare it on my blog, until my doctor officially tells me at around 14 weeks like a normal, more patient pregnant woman would do.

Until then, I am also not going to tell Maddie because she will think either her mother is crazy, or that babies can just change gender in utero.

On a positive note, Josh and I went to see the broadway play The Lion King at Mandalay Bay and it was FANTASTIC. I cried at least four times, but that could just be a pregnancy thing. I was blown away by the costumes, sets, and talent and would highly recommend it. It is definitely child friend too if your kid is old enough to sit still.

It's a boy! (unless it is a Peter situation)

Yesterday, I had a doctor appointment. I am about 10 1/2 weeks along, so I, of course, pressured my doctor to tell me the gender. His immediate reaction was, "it looks maleish, but lets see what we find," followed by, "it's just too early to say for sure. I don't want to be wrong. Let's wait until 12 weeks." Josh had the biggest grin I had ever seen, and I was in shock and tears! Really? Another boy!? For some reason I wasn't expecting that AT ALL.

So he said "maleish" but said it was too early to tell. That would drive me crazy for the next few weeks. So, my sister, who is also pregnant, and I went to one of those places that you pay for an ultrasound and find out the gender and get pictures of your baby. Jamie is for sure having a boy, and I am 99% also having a boy. We feel like we are having twins or something, and we both left squealing and speed-dialing the proud daddies.

However, because I am not very far along, it is only 99%. You would think that was pretty definitive, but my mom was told that I was a boy when I was in-utero. She even had my named picked out: Peter. (I know, I would have been the nerdiest boy.) So you never know what will happen!

I know Ultrasound pictures are totally annoying to people except the mother, who is immediately in love with the little blob. But here is the little guy playing hide-and-seek with his arms up over his eyes.

On a side note: As you can imagine, Maddie didn't take the "little brother" news very well AT ALL. She is a little more excited since I took her to the store to pick out whatever little boy clothes she wanted, but it is going to take some serious time for her to get over her dream of a little sister, whom she had already named "Charlie."

Just a silly post

Here is Maddie being a kitty nurse and feeding my mom's abandoned kitties with a bottle. As you can imagine, she loved that job.

In my family, pregnant women are spoiled rotten. Mostly by the other women in the family who know how miserable it can be. So even though I rarely feel sick this pregnancy (how lucky am I?), I am taking full advantage of it because who knows how many times I will get to do that in the future? So I got the best chair in the room, I hoarded the entire plate of nachos, stole Josh's drink, etc., etc. Josh took a picture of me acting like royalty so I would feel a little embarrassed, but it didn't work. Soon after, I asked Josh for a refill.    :o)

Of course, the thorn in my side is my sister is also pregnant, so I have to be nice to her too and don't get to boss her around as much as I would like. But she is due about two months before me, so I am just waiting until then to take full advantage....